I had a little scare with mombat yesterday. On nice sunny days, she likes to get out and walk down her street a ways. It's sort of a downhill slope to the stop sign, then we turn around and come back, and it's never been a problem before. Yesterday, though, before we were halfway back to her house, she started leaning WAY forward, and breathing hard. I got her to stop and put my arms around her, and she sagged against me with almost her full weight. We went a little farther, and ran into a neighbor who got us a lawn chair. She rested, and we made it home, but this is definitely a turning point, as she was taking that walk twice a day last fall without a problem. She has an appointment with her doctor tomorrow, and I hope that we can come to some conclusions together about how best to work with mom and keep her motivating. If she becomes immobile, I know we won't be able to continue to care for her at home. She is too heavy for me to lift alone, and there are stairs to navigate at her house that won't be possible for us to use.
I think that mom is beginning to see that her situation is becoming precarious. More and more often, she talks about "getting old". Yesterday morning when I arrived, she had been talking with Tom about how she should "split things up", meaning who of the 4 of us should get what when the time comes. We eventually convinced her that none of us needed anything, and that we should just leave things as they are. I clearly recall about 20 years ago that she had her will drawn up, naming her executor and dividing equally her assets among the four of us. It reminds me that I need to do the same thing. I don't have much, but I know which of my brothers will get Butterball.
That being said, I am off to start my day and see that things go smoothly for mom today. Bless you, friends, for reading and for thinking of me. I may not be able to communicate with each of you on a regular basis, but I hope you know how much I appreciate your thoughts and prayers. Right back atcha, friends!
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Kathy,
ReplyDeleteI know first hand, how hard it is to watch a loved-one deteriorate. My heart goes out to you, and to what your mom is finally beginning to realize. It is SO difficult to have to put them in the care of others (been there, done that too), but that day does eventually come. It will be a huge help to you if your mom realizes this also. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. You are a very good person Kathy, bless you.
Kathy,
ReplyDeleteI am so tardy on this reply having been in Buffalo visiting Scott and Vi to help during Vi's recuperation from surgery.
But I do know first hand as Sandy does that watching someone you love become more ill day by day is painful beyond words.
The decisions you will soon need to make for your mom will not be easy - for any of you. Your mom is concerned with the more practical details of growing older, and unfortunately you and your brothers need to make much more difficult decisions.
Though it may be difficult to find the blessings in AD, your mom is blessed to have you and your brothers to help her through the journey ahead. It will not be an easy one, but you are not alone. And while some of us may be far away in distance, there is no measuring stick needed for the hearts connected by friendship.
Praying that the path will be gentle, and that always you know we are there walking with you.
Hugs and love,
Sue